Missed something on the show today? Here are some of the best bits from the show...all in one place!
Nard’s new bottomless business.
Trout balls are a cure.
Fast food can kill ya...and more!
What’s Happening:
#5 ‘I was poor as hell — now I make thousands as a topless maid but it’s dangerous’
Nard’s Bottomless Cleaning...with his little balls. - Derek
#4 Rejected personalized license plates in New York state
My grandpa used to tell me mom, she’s such a whore, she should put her number on the license plate - Derek
#3 Denver man injured in port-a-potty prank
I saw the portable potty and then I go to pee-pee - Billy
#2 Church-goers disturbed by ‘loud moaning’ from next-door massage parlour ‘brothel’
They’re just doing their church service, and then they hear moanin’ and groanin’ - Billy
I think she helped solve a double murder. All because she was a prostitute. - Billy
Big Ass World News:
#5 Apple’s Vision Pro buyers upset to discover that VR porn doesn’t work: ‘$3,500 chastity belt’
I just want to be Iron Man...that’s all I want - Billy
#4 59% of women share this sexual fantasy — but what does it really mean?
I can’t even get (my wife) to be nice to another woman - Derek
#3 Trout gonads can cure baldness when injected into head, according to scientists
Yeah...you can put some trout balls on my head - Chris
Charge her! - Nard
The grandparents of today are waaaaay lazier than the grandparents of yesterday! - Derek
Top 5 Buttheads:
#5 Teacher ‘locks boy, 11, in class and strokes his privates as he fondles her boobs’
He’s like Kim Jung Uwl - Nard
You get a big fountain drink, and out the door you accidently drop it - Derek
#3 Anesthetist strangled partner with dressing gown and dumped body with bag over face
That’s a bad butthead!! - Derek
You’d think they’d all be high and chill - Derek
#1 Man beats roommate to death over Taco Bell
He Was 72!!!! - Derek