Death sending inappropriate Snapchats...and more!

What’s Happening:

#5 Lackawanna County animal shelter hosts unique fundraiser

“We’re gonna name a stray cat after your ex and then take the balls off” - Billy

#4 Illinois lawmaker introduces bill that would prevent police from stopping drivers who speed, commit other infractions

“What about drinking and driving?” - Derek

#3 Man sentenced to 100 years for killing co-worker who stole his lunch from work fridge

“Why are you putting your fart lunch next to mine?” - Derek

#2 Armed and dangerous’ wife on the run in Oregon after shooting husband dead

“She’s armed...I don’t know if she’s dangerous” - Derek

#1 Parents sue Hooters after child gets hurt

“(Nard’s baby momma) says that place is the Devil - Nard

Bonus: Drug addict tries to steal disabled pensioner’s car but she fights back with walking stick

“Have you had a crackhead try to steal your Uber?” - Billy

Big Ass World News:

#5 The ‘Travis Kelce’ haircut is taking barbershops by storm: They ‘think they’ll get a new girlfriend’

“I saw some girl on Tik-Tok calling them the Kentucky Chiefs” - Derek

#4 Completely naked’ Florida man barges into church thrift shop and steals T-shirt, deputies say

“He had to look like Bigfoot going in there. Big foot, little wiener” - Billy

#3 39-year-old mother-of-19 reveals she’s pregnant with her TWENTIETH child (all with DIFFERENT men) and says she will keep having kids until she can no longer conceive - despite admitting she can’t afford to support her family

“She loves wiener...and having kids” - Billy

#2 Bizarre penis-enlarging TikTok trend ‘jelqing’ claims to add ‘an inch in girth’ - but could actually make your genitals SMALLER

“DON’T DO IT”- Billy & Derek

#1 What’s a ‘Diaper Spa,’ and why is it raising eyebrows in New Hampshire?

“Yeah...I’d Try It.” - Chris

Top 5 Buttheads:

#5 PA mother left child alone before moving to New Jersey to be with boyfriend

“Is Nard defending the parents leaving the children behind?” - Derek

#4 This Generation Is Doomed: Mother Taught Her 4 Year Old Son How To Roll Up After She Got Tired Of Rolling Her Own Blunts!

“What’s the difference between this and the dad who makes his kid get him a beer?” - Derek

#3 Michigan woman aged SEVENTY NINE is charged with sending inappropriate Snapchats to underage child: Retired from school last year

“SHE LOOKS LIKE DEATH” - Derek

#2 Frontier Airlines flyer who flashed ‘her anus and genitalia’ hit with federal charges

“You can’t charge her enough if she’s showing her anus.” -Billy

#1 Brit tourist ‘faked abduction in seedy sex hotspot to extort money from own family’

“...so he could spend it on hookers” - Billy

Bonus: TikTok ‘sickos’ impersonate dead teen and told friends ‘I’m alive’ as mum blasts prank

“Really Rude!” - Billy